Encounter with God

Viviane Freitas

  • 27
  • Jun
  • 2015

Encounter with God

  • 27
  • Jun
  • 2015

“Mrs. Viviane, I would like to know, how did you have your encounter with God?” – Suzana Vieira

Hello Cybernaut Suzana,

It is with much pleasure and satisfaction that I speak about my encounter with God.

At 15 years old, I moved to São Paulo, Brazil… I was living in New York and I was conceited. I am going to speak a little bit about my past, resuming my how my encounter was.

When I lived in New York, I would go to church every Wednesday and Sunday. But Fridays were the worst day of the week for me, why? Because I had Friday, Saturday, and Sunday where I wouldn’t see the boy that I liked, who was from school. This boy was one of the “populars” and I liked him dor three years, but I never tried to get close or clearly reveal my interest. I had a lot of passion for the guidance my parents provided me. I knew that if I disobeyed, I wouldn’t be happy. But my body did not stop “liking” that boy, even when I wasn’t doing anything in that respect.

I was the “good girl”. I didn’t have nay friends in school, I was part of the “out crowd” to not be alone. But, not even the out crowd accepted me, because I wasn’t part of this world but neither did I give my all to God. On the contrary, I loved and enjoyed that “platonic love”. I would look at him when he was distracted and when he wasn’t noticing. That was the frustrating life I would live in.

At home, I was a “little piece of heaven”. But at the same time I was hollow inside. I thought that it was because I had no friends or boyfriend. But this was not the case.

At church, I cried in all the Wednesday meetings and I would feel better, but my life didn’t change. I wouldn’t leave church decided to let go of all my “worldly” attractions. Quite the opposite, I liked those moments where I was able to look at the boy. I would dress to attract his attention. And my thoughts revolved around that passion. All the music, all the moments I had to myself, my prayers would always be about the boy. I would ask God, “Convert him.” It was everything I needed at that time.

I didn’t see my emptiness. I thought it was normal to feel like I was missing something, in my reality, I was missing that lack of boyfriend and friends.

When I moved to São Paulo (Brazil), I wasn’t close to that boy, who was, I came to realize, was a great thing! And it was a great opportunity. On the plane, I looked out the window, and I said my goodbyes, “Goodbye guy”

I was sad, but it was never revealed because I was, nonetheless, the “funny one” when I was near my family.
Everything was very hidden.

But something was still missing.

I was in São Paulo, at the church of Brás, and I started to really leave my will behind; however, my dreams followed me even to Brazil. Night dreams… I would always dream with that boy and seeing scenes that would not normally make part of my actual life. Until one day, I got tired of those dreams that I could not control.

I went to a service and I spoke, determined decidedly, with God, that I didn’t want this past anymore:

“I don’t want to even dream. Even if its a dream, I do not want it. I want the Lord.”

And I began to go to the service seeking and desiring to give myself more. And it was in that church in Brás that everything happened.

In a meeting, I saw everything that I was not seeing before, because I “wasn’t doing anything wrong”, but I would desire inappropriate things. I saw myself a sinner just as much as a prostitute. I saw how dirty I was. I was faaaar from being someone “good”. Apparently I didn’t have any problems, but when I had my encounter with God, I saw a well of dirtiness.

It was there that I poured myself out, I cried. I was upset, but in that same day, I saw the Love of God had for me. His Compassion. And from there, I began to give my everything. Until one day I was baptized with the Holy Spirit.

Leave a message

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


10 comentários

  1. When we trutly seek God within we will surely find him
    only thing we need to do is sacrifice our wrong desires for him

    See more
  2. When we give up everything including the hidden thoughts nobody knows to Him then He is able to open our spiritual eyes and reveal Himself to us!!

    See more
  3. Thank you for sharing Mrs V

    See more
1 2